7. Talli glasswatera
On a hilarious sidenote, this Trike has become mildly famous again as an attempt by intelligent author Joyce Oates to have a sense of humour was taken by the internet (because the internet) as a sign she’s not very bright.
3. Duckosaurus bigmistakeus
But if the only thing about the Spinosaurus that made it a memorable failure was the T. rex fight, I’d just be the latest in a long line of whiny fanboys. Oh no, the Spinosaurus unfortunately suffered from a mishandling that no other dinosaur in the franchise can match. In an attempt to make the film more family friendly, it was made into what can only be called a farce. It spends the entire hour and a half film hunting down the human cast for no reason. At all. It just keeps appearing and trying to kill everyone. It goes from shattering a steel fence to being blocked by a wooden door in the space of 15 seconds. Most ridiculously, it has a shockingly bad scene where it apparently got a phone stuck in its gullet. The phone then rings, a lot. The heroes think its a person and run towards the sound. They all look confused, turn and see the dinosaur, still with the phone ringing. It must have been standing there for at least 2 minutes, in clear viewing, waiting for them to turn. Apparently for terrifying predator see “the call is coming from inside the house”.
Spinosaurus would go on to be a frequent opponent of T. rex in various movies and tv shows, but it’s probably not a coincidence that 9 times out of 10 it was made into the hapless villain you were waiting to see get its ass beat. Sadly the Jurassic Park III Spinosaurus is memorable, but memorable only for tainting the species for a generation of movie goers. Considering how cool Spinosaurus actually is, I’m not sure I can forgive the team behind Jurassic Park III for this atrocity.
And own it she did.